Thursday, April 23, 2009

The order of things...

Gabe is trying to work out the ways of the world. He tells us that when he was a baby, Hamish was a big boy. And now Hamish is a baby, so he is a big boy. He also doesn't like Abbey telling him she is bigger. "But I'm big too Mummy".

Abbey has decided she likes a soft pink baby blanket that used to be mine. I told her today that it was mine when I was a baby. I didn't even realise that Gabe was listening. "But who was your Mummy then Mummy" :). Oh the innocence!

Friday, April 10, 2009

A very sad day...

Our day began at 4am. Ernie woke us up literally crying at the lounge room window. He even woke Aaron up & usually not even the kids do that. This was after I went to bed too late as usual around 12.30, and Gabe woke me up twice just to tell me he fell out of bed. He was fine but apparently just wanted to let me know :).

I had fed Ernie about 12 & given him a little water. He seemed fine, nothing out of the ordinary. I didn't hear a peep out of him the two times Gabe & I were wandering the house. Not sure of those times but maybe at 2 & then 3? At 4 he definitely wasn't fine. He was very distressed & thank goodness Aaron woke spontaneously & I didn't have to spend time trying to wake him. Ernie wasn't limping or anything else obvious & then it didn't take us long to realise that his belly was very swollen & seeming to bet bigger by the minute. He couldn't really lie down properly at this stage. I called our vet's and the emergency message said to go to Hallam Veterinary Hospital for emergencies after hours or they would be open from 10am (today being Good Friday). Aaron got him to Hallam by 4.45am as we quickly decided that there was no way we could wait until 10. By the time they got there he was quickly assessed and had a pulse of over 300. An x-ray revealed a twisted stomach caused by bloat. Something I had never heard of until today but is apparently the 2nd leading cause of death in dogs after cancer. We were offered the option of surgery (for $3000), but with no guarantees. A blood test with some kind of marker (?blood gas) was 5.8. We were told there was no hope if it was over 6. So we opted to let him peacefully go to sleep.

RIP our sweet Ernie. 21st December 2002 - 10th April 2009.

He was a dog like no other, and our 1st (fur) baby. For a Cocker Spaniel he was amazing. Beautiful, loving, obedient (mostly) but with the craziness of a spaniel thrown in.

He was wonderful with the kids. We never had any transitional problems with him when we brought Abbey home. The only change in his behaviour was that he growled at any strange male who entered our house once Abbey arrived. Very bravely from the safety of his bed! And then he quickly adapted to 2 more babies joining our family, all within the space of 3 yrs and 3 months. Abbey has always just accepted him being around. To her "Nernie" was a friend. She even called her lovey "Nee" which we can only think must be after Ernie. Until she was able to play with Gabe, Ernie was her playmate. Gabe has always been more wary of him & of any dogs. Just this week he has finally taken the huge step of playing outside with Ernie around, instead of having Ernie came inside whilst he was out! And the weird thing was both kids spent all morning Wednesday & Thursday outside playing with Ernie. Normally for Ab it was always in short bursts. It was almost as if they knew and needed that time. I hope they have some memories. And as for Hamish, he loved Ernie most of all. I am sad just that he won't have the chance to really play with him. That would have been wonderful to watch. From the moment he started crawling his 1st destination was Ernie. Poor Ernie tolerated having his hair pulled & the baby kisses.

I even saw my big strong husband cry today. And as for me- well I have alternated feeling guilty that I haven't had enough time for Ernie lately & just plain sad that we don't have him any more. I may have had less time for him, but the kids made that up to him I think. I think he knew he was very loved. And I think that anyone who knows us- understands that- because everyone who knows us, knows Ernie. He always amazed everyone that he came straight inside onto his bed & stayed there. We wanted him inside, but we didn't want a dog roaming all over our house, shedding & making it 'doggy'. This was our compromise, he had his controlled inside time, but slept in his kennel outside the back door. The only time he ever left his bed was one night Aaron had friends over playing computer games & I came out to see him playing soccer in the lounge with a big soft ball. He was though still a puppy at the time! And another time Abbey was sick and for some reason I was home with her myself. Ernie seemed to know and came to check that she was ok. Oh and the vaccumm was enough to send him on his way too. Abbey would sit with him on his bed when she was a baby to escape the vaccuum!

Right now he is still at the vet's but on Sunday we are planning to take his body to Omeo to bury him & have a little ceremony. Hopefully this will help the kids just a little. Death is a difficult concept for an adult, but trying to describe the difference between a spirit and a body, and heaven, and that dead means gone forever to a 4 yr old & a 2 1/2 yr old is near impossible. Lately the big kids have been obsessed with looking at the moon every night. Well tonight Aaron told them that heaven is at the moon, so that they can see the moon and know that Ernie is watching them from there. I thought that was a beautiful symbolic concept. In fact I might even use it myself for some comfort!